Is grinding really dancing?
I really don’t think so. Why do you insist that it is? It really isn’t.
Me neither.
I really don’t think so. Why do you insist that it is? It really isn’t.
Me neither.
Grinding is so easy to do, that even kids as young as five do this.
Well, I helped Muetti’s friend stop her son (he was 8 or 10, I believe) from dancing something pretty similar to freak dancing but with some space, in front of his girl friends, who were younger than him, after a recent Sunday Mass. His mother spanked him with a rolled up bulletin from my Catholic church and said that it was inappropriate. His father says he should cut down on the cartoons.
I helped further by pulling him over and told him the same thing. He claimed that it was Tom and Jerry (the cartoons), but I believe it was more than that. I think he saw something on home video, Internet video-sharing site, or television that involved live-action (non-animated) people doing what he did, but against their partner’s crotch or butt.
Then, I went into the car of one of Muetti’s friends, and I told the kids about the boy’s dancing. I told them that high schoolers do it in dances, despite the rules, and how even middle and elementary schoolers do it too. I told them this dancing rule: face-to-face with some space. He might have not agreed with me, but with persuasion, he can learn the right and wrong ways to dance throughout life.
My heroic (or pretty heroic) advocacy towards kids young as 3 about grinding came to show that 3 years old is never too young to learn that the social dance is inappropriate. I hope my story can spur parents, teachers, and others to have their kids use common sense when dancing.
there will be none at winter ball for all of those in attendance. seriously, ladies and gentlemen, let’s stop degrading ourselves as we try and simulate animal-like sex on the dance floor. we look like idiots. we’re not even looking at each other! to quote a very wise woman, “i’m really not…
Well said - I was a victim of the dance from a church dance in my junior year till homecoming in my senior year. Also, it causes many schools to cancel dances. Just read the news on a recent one that canceled its Winter Ball.
Grinding was once the dance at dance clubs, but thanks to music videos it became popular with teenagers. The moves are so easy to do that even a preschooler can learn them. Of course, parents, teachers, and other concerned people are fed up with it because it simulates sexual intercourse.
There are solutions to discourage freak dancing. One extreme measure is to cancel future dances when students continue to dance dirtily at one. Another sensible way is to have them wear wristbands to be cut off when they dance inappropriately or to have them sign a contract.
Another way is to hire a live band because they are less likely to play music suitable for the way they dance (in a sexual manner, of course). In the non-school field, those who invite guests at dance parties or receptions involving that activity write along the lines of “no grinding” in their invitations.
But there’s another solution some schools and other organizers consider to discourage anyone from grinding: ballroom dancing and cotillions.
Pros
There are benefits to learning ballroom dancing, besides the fact that it burns calories. For the main part, it teaches people the proper way to dance. You really can’t sway your hips behind your partner who’s doing so likewise when a Strauss waltz plays. You have to learn how to dance to it.
Also, you learn basic dance etiquette. While eager students get on the dance floor and start to grind along to recent hits that fit the dance, students learn to ask their partners on the dance floor. That gives them more confidence to dance with the opposite sexes.
Best of all, that method of social dancing allows them to meet new friends as well as the old. The best way to do so is to form cotillions. They are programs designed for people to properly dance, boost their self-confidence, and meet each other.
I for one have danced in a cotillion as a teen, and I loved it so much that I wished all dances with formal wear (school-sponsored or not) can do it. The dance featured in mine was the waltz, but others can include salsa, tango, and foxtrot as well.

Well, at least it’s not grinding.
Cons
Ballroom dancing has its flaws. Instructors are really hard to come by, and lessons can be very expensive. A great way to pare down on costs is to find a friend or volunteer someone to help participants learn the steps. Schools would love to recruit their students who are really good at it, but sometimes they prefer bump-and-grind over dancing mambo.
Also, the music for that type of dancing with friends is lame. Although DJs crank out tunes for it as well, bands big and small (especially big bands with 12-15 wind instruments and small classical-style orchestras) take advantage of it. (Remember that they play mostly lame music, which can turn off teens.) Something in the likes of Wine, Woman, and Song (a Strauss Waltz) can anger those who embrace “sexual bending” or dancing with little space front-to-back.
Speaking of not being able to grind and being told to dance like “their great-grandparents,” participants feel as if organizers are plunging them back to the Regency Era. (Well, that’s when cotillions were at their heights, anyway!) Dressing in semi-formal to formal clothing (tuxedos, gowns, etc.) is not a problem especially for teens participating in homecomings, proms, and the like.
But what if organizers force them to learn the dances and have them wear cravats, knee-breeches, empire-waist dresses, and petticoats? What if they make students learn reels, waltzes, and other group dances at the time? They would deem the measure as “too stuffy.”
Teen Who Loves Grinding: Wow - that’s like, totally laaaaaaaaaaammmmme.
School Administrator: No it’s not - it’s the proper way to dance!
Some of the dancing at ballrooms is just as bad as freak dancing. Take a gander at the ballroom dancing on television, for instance. There are too much closed positions in the sauciest of salsas and rumbas, as well as a minimal amount of grinding (but not in a way that’s too common). Fortunately, most classes offer family-friendly versions of them.
In fact, most dances started out as being thorny to society. For instance, Catholics and other moralists bashed the waltz during the Regency Era, but that didn’t stop there. In 2007, the education ministry in China urged schools to implement the waltz in their curriculums to combat childhood obesity.
Some teachers, parents, and critics decried it because the closed positions encourage premature infatuation. (That means that dancing it would incite “puppy love.”) Simply put, they had the same views as the moralists did in the early 1800’s. Thus, a handful of schools opted out of the program.
Despite being so lame to dance party participants as well as expensive, ballroom dancing can be a boon to everyone. But there are questions organizers need to consider when they hold a party with at least a third of the dances in the genre. Is it feasible and appealing for the target audience? What are the costs for a good instructor? How would the guests react to the measure?
On top of that, does ballroom dancing work – just for the sake of clean dancing?
There are numerous reasons why parents prefer homeschooling to any other method of schooling. By having kids under this intimate education system, you protect them from bullies, teasing, and overstimulation that burden them in a regular school. Also, parents save a considerable amount of commute time when they hire a teacher who would help the children learn and succeed, compared to putting them in a bus.
But there’s another reason to homeschool: a lot of the school dances involve a lewd dance called grinding.
So what is grinding, you ask. Also known as “freak dancing,” “twerking,” or “doing the butt,” it’s a very basic yet highly sexual dance. Simply shake your hips behind your partner’s back end and keep a very small distance between yourselves.
It’s often danced to hip-hop and reggaeton, two of the music genres that teens show interest in listening. (For the latter, freaking to the music is called perreo, after the Spanish term for “dog.”) The front-to-back dancing is very common in school dances and others that are meant to be family-friendly.
I had a lot of experiences with the dance. When I was one of the leaders in my Catholic parish’s youth retreat, I grinded because I saw a lot of my peers do it. That’s an example of peer pressure because I knew right that instant that everyone was doing it and the movements were so easy to learn.
The same peer pressure held true with homecoming in my senior year – almost all my friends on the dance floor formed pairs or “grind trains” and I joined in. I soon realized how lewd the majority and I danced was very inappropriate and vowed myself that it was the last time I grinded.
Contrast the public school life with homeschooling – it eliminates all the peer pressure in everything, including dancing. The only person the pupil has to deal with is the teacher or the parent who is teaching. Also, it shields them from outside influence, namely the results of media oversexualization. No, I’m not just counting the skimpy clothes that preteens, teens, and other women wear, but also the way kids dance.
You may wonder whatever happened to the waltz (Believe me, it was criticized for being too scandalous a few times, particularly in the early 1800’s and in 2007.) or other “clean dances.” Sadly, most teens who think that freak dancing is the only known method of dancing renounced those dances they danced as children.
Speaking of children, grinding is a too-easy party dance. In a few home videos taped in a nation where reggaeton became popular, several elementary school-aged children freak danced. In one of them, some girls held on to the wall and straddled one leg around their partners as they grinded. Having seen these videos, I blame media influence as well as poor real-life role models (especially teenage siblings or parents) for influencing children to dance provocatively.
School dances that involve teenage bum-on-pelvis dancing are one good reason to homeschool. No child should ever learn how to dance dirtily as his or her own peers. With that program, a child can learn how to dance properly, and some teachers are able to teach them ballroom dancing of any genre. Of course, there’s a slim chance that a child would bump and grind when he gets his schooling at home!
I wrote a guest post on the St. Petersburg Times education blog about - well, you know what issue is at hand!
I would like to reiterate that I grinded in high school and soon realized after homecoming that it was inappropriate. Also, I noted in the post that I created this blog in response to a few videos featuring those under 13 freak dancing. Thus, I leave you with an excerpt from the post:
There’s no need to either enroll them into expensive ballroom dance studios or pressure schools to mandate cotillions (group dancing reminiscent of the early to mid-1800’s) on prom or homecoming participants. Proper dancing is all about having students use their common sense, and parents and teachers are here to make sure they use it and learn to use it.
Speaking of which, still hold tight for my post on whether dance classes curb grinding!
Kimberly Swygert, of the education blog Number 2 Pencil, writes a post in response to a school’s ban on dances years ago after students did all the grinding despite being warned beforehand. Here’s what she has to say:
How ‘bout Bennett sponsors a dance class during lunch, or has the students learn steps in gym? I mean, it’s entirely possible that these kids really don’t know any other moves that are fun yet un-dorky. Bennett could attempt to make un-freaky dancing “cool” again, which would show that he’s doing his part to help solve the problem. I agree that there should be scary chaperones and tough peers to enforce the no-freak rules at dances - but it would be fair to enable kids to learn some other way to dance as well.
Well, I mostly agree with you, but having a dance class is costly if a school hires world-class ballroom dancing instructors. If someone in the school is really good at it and can be a candidate for teaching lessons, he or she is likely to prefer freak dancing.
So anyway, stay tuned for my post exclusively on GYFDO on the advantages and disadvantages of ballroom dancing lessons and how they can deter students from bum-on-pelvis dancing!
Recently, a school by the name of Romeo High (Yes, that’s the name!) in Michigan laid down rules and expectations for the homecoming dance. To add to the “no grinding” rule, they prohibit their participants from touching their private parts, butt, and chests. Also, they make them refrain from bending over and keeping either foot or both feet off the dance floor!
Oh, and they make students wear two wristbands each. They will cut the first one off as a warning when they freak dance, and then they will cut the second one and ask them to leave on the second.
Keep it up, Romeo High - I want to hear your report of the dance on my blog! Also, drop me a line on your opinions of the lewd dancing!
We parents, teachers, and some concerned others are fed up with a dance that numerous teenagers and some adults do in dance parties, school dances, wedding receptions, and other events that involve dancing: grinding. To perform the social dance to basic way, you either gyrate your hips behind a shaking butt or the other way around, with as little space as possible. That move is the shocking character of the dance.
It’s so easy that even preschoolers can do it.
Well, here are some tips to stop the provocative dancing, whether you are a parent, a teacher, or a prude aunt:
You don’t have to make your next prom into a stuffy one that involves Regency Era attire and dancing lessons that are mandatory to students given beforehand! Just teach them to shake their groove thing in a proper way!
There’s no need to ban whole future dances outright because a majority of participants did a lot of dirty dancing on the previous one. Ditto for planning a wedding reception without dancing because you saw a lot of guests dance provocatively in the previous one you attended. Discouraging anyone from dancing in a family-unfriendly manner is not all about teaching them dance lessons. Simply put, keeping them from doing it is a matter of teaching them common sense.
I’m going to Mickey’s Not-So-Scary Halloween Party in less than two weeks. No, I’m not talking about the dandy parade, the candy collecting, and the fireworks that make you scream for more.
I’m talking about the dance parties!
I know what you are thinking - the Magic Kingdom is the place where you can cut loose and grind like there’s no tomorrow! Well, it’s not the place to start a grinding line because it’s meant for everyone from 1 to 100! I hope that all the spots where people dance are free of all the freak dancing.
Here’s to a grind-free Walt Disney World!